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When Anya was at Vai’s age (he’s turning two years old in less than two weeks), she could already recognise and name most of the alphabets. She knew her shapes, colours, and recognised many many people by their names too (ie. names of her friends, their mommies and daddies, etc)

While the big sister is more into things that require thinking, memorising and fine motor skills, we notice how the little brother is more into physically-related activities (ie. gross motor skills), like jumping - he can now hop forward twice or three times with both feet off the floor, climbing and tumbling about. Things that Anya couldn’t do or master when she was at Vai’s age.

Yes, having two kids with different interests, characters and capabilities does highlight the fact that each child is special and different, and how it is thus important for us parents to value and accept this reality.

That each child has his own unique ‘development time’.

That he is an individual, specially created by God.

That it’s completely okay if our child still can’t do certain things that his sibling or friends already can perform at his age.

…

I must say though that as parents, we do have a natural tendency to see how other kids are doing and ‘mentally compare’ them with ours.

In the end however, I think what’s most important is what we actually do ‘after’ we mentally compare our child to another.

Do we condemn him for not performing like his siblings and friends? Do we verbally and condescendingly joke about our child’s late development in front of the child and our friends? Do we look down on our own child’s ability and development? Do we pressurise our child, expecting him to perform and be like his peers?

Or, do we acknowledge how our child is unique, and at the same time feel truly happy to see other children who’re developing well in many more areas?

It’s a reality check for all parents.

Us included.