Parenting: “Do Your Best!”
“Do your best!”, we often say to our kids.
We tend to say it before they go for their exams, sports competitions, etc.
But have we thought about what “Do your best!” mean TO THEM?
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On top of saying “Do your best!” to our children, it’d be helpful if we ask them to share and list out their “specific, concrete, achievable, small goals” that they will do if they are to “do their best”.
Because without such list of things to do, “do your best!” statements become too vague and “abstract” for them.
Let’s say, if they’re preparing for their final exams, then “doing their best” may mean:
– reducing the amount of daily use of phone to play online games with friends, from 1.5 hours to 30mins a day?
– going through chapter ___ to chapter ___ later today, between 5pm – 7pm
– etc.
Or, if they’re about to go for a sports competition, then “doing their best” may mean:
– getting a good rest the night before, waking up early, making sure your stomach is filled with food that’s good for the body that will go under pressure
– preparing own water bottles and change of clothes either early in the morning or the night before
– remembering past practices and advices from coach, and putting them into action when you’re all alone fighting on the court
– Moving your feet, catching every ball, and striving to win every point
– etc.
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Kids would need our help and guidance since young, so they can learn to be more independentGenerally, kids would need our help and guidance since young, so they can learn to be more independent and are better trained to think of such “concrete things to do” in order to “do their best”.
For example:
– When they’re young (even from the age of 5-6yo), we can help by coming up with a list of “Things to do” FOR them (i.e. a “Check List”), so that they can prepare them themselves
(Important: Refrain from doing it FOR them, e.g. Do not prepare the water bottles for them)
– As they grow older, we can have a regular chat with them and verbally go through their concrete “things to do” if they’re to do their best.
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What other things would you do with the kids if you’re to help them “do their best”?
