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Home » Parenting

Parenting Tips and Thoughts : Raising respectful children

10 November 2008No Comment

When babies are born, we find them all cute and adorable, don’t we? Their little coos and gurgles. Their tiny hands holding onto our fingers. Their eyes looking oh so intently into ours. Treasured and sweet moments indeed.

And, all babies grow up. They gradually become more independent. They learn to communicate their wants. And the reality is, from toddlerhood on, when these little ones wish to exert their demands, opinions and quest for independence, things (unfortunately) tend to end up looking and sounding rather far from cute and adorable.

They are (very much) capable of screaming, kicking a fuss, throwing toys around in their moments of ‘unhappiness’ and talking back in an unkind manner. To name a few.

Yes. Little children, in essence, are small versions of us adults.  And they’re sinners just like us.

Fortunately there are useful tips and thoughts out there that we can consider, explore and implement, that will at least help us a little bit in raising our children to be respectful beings (and most often than not, it’ll need us parents to actively review our existing parenting values and our own daily words and actions too)

Anyway, here I’ve extracted parts of a write-up that I believe will be useful.

Have a good read, everyone!

Source : Parents Talk

Step #1
Teach through actions

“Do as I say, not as I do” sounds like a fun idea, but as a parenting tool it rarely (if ever) works. You are your child’s first and most important teacher. Just as children learn to talk by listening to us talk, they learn how to treat others by following our lead. Watch how you treat, not only your kids, but other people you come in contact with during your day. What are you teaching your kids? Teach more than just manners.

When we teach our children manners we must also discuss the not-so-obvious details. Such as looking someone in the eye, using a polite tone of voice, and using real words (such as “yes” instead of “uh huh!”) These are not things our kids are born knowing. We need to teach these important facets of good manners.

Step #2
Be firm but fair
Letting kids get away with bad behavior only breeds more of the same. Make sure your kids know the rules of the family and that you discipline appropriately when rules are broken.

Firm and fair discipline is not haphazard and does not change depending on your mood. It requires a consistency that your kids can count on. (They may not like it, but they can count on it!) I’ve heard it said that it’s not the severity of a consequence that makes it effective, but the certainty of it. When your kids know exactly what your expectations are, and that there will be a penalty for failing to meet those expectations, they will more likely behave in an appropriate manner.

Step #3
Praise good behavior
Your praise and encouragement have a tremendous impact on your child. “Praise” messages are not all verbal, either. An OK hand signal, a wink, a smile, a hug. All these speak volumes to a child who has just done something right. These positive messages reinforce a child’s goodness, and encourage more of the same positive behavior.

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