26 January 2008
Action + Consequence + Responsibility
Category : Parenting, Principles & Values Permalink · No Comments »
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As our little ones grow, so is their curiosity. And the great thing about such increasing curiosity is that they get to discover new things about their world.
The ‘not-so-good’ aspect about it, well, while they test things out to see the ‘effects’ of their actions, they may venture into things that they’re not supposed to do.
Like, throwing toys around or pouring water onto the living room floor!
At first they may not ‘know’ that they’re not supposed to do them. But them being toddlers, generally even after we parents tell and explain - repeatedly - why some actions shouldn’t be done, they may choose to … not obey too.
Personally, I believe in letting kids know - since young - that there are consequences to everything. That we all need to learn and be responsible for our actions.
If they spill water onto the floor, they need to know that someone may slip and fall. And so we (including the child who spilled it) need to wipe the floor dry.
Today when Vai was drawing with crayons, he went to check out how his blue crayon would look on our dining chair!
He was vigorously colouring the chair when I realised what he was doing. I then gave him a firm ‘No no no!’, got down to his level, took his crayon, looked him in the eye and firmly told him how he’s to draw on his paper, not on furniture.
He got back to his paper. But within ten seconds, he went to draw on the dining chair, again! (This time, he chose the one next to the previous one).
After telling him again and again (the cycle happened for about 4 -5 times!), I decided to pack his crayons. I then gave him a damp cloth and explained to him how he’s to wipe the chair clean because he was the one who drew on them.

He managed to clean about 20% of it. And when I took over, I explained what I was doing while he watched me wipe the blue stains off the two chairs.
Hmm.
In such cases, yes it’d be much faster and easier if we just wipe it clean ourselves from the beginning. But if we tend to always do that, our little ones will miss out on an important life lesson - to be responsible and accountable for their own actions.
Worse, they’d gradually learn not to be too concerned about their own actions, because someone else will bear the consequences anyway!
Ah. Teaching our little ones need so much patience.
May God continually give us parents the needed persistence, consistency and wisdom in teaching our little ones.
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Shortly after, Anya asked if she could nap for a while, and so while she dozed off, I then had some one-on-one time with the well rested little guy too, who’s now very much awake.